JOKES COLUMN
A girl named Nazia suffers pangs of loneliness and records it in her diaries as she takes night walks. Is she then Nazia or Nausea?
NAUSEA by Rahul Aijaz
I want to write a sequel of Sartre's Nausea, but based in Pakistan. It'll revolve around a girl who takes long walks in Gulshan streets and is bothered by everything around her (just like Antoine Roquentin). She ponders over existence and what it means as she struggles to write a biography of General Rani.
I'll call it "Nazia".
PIZZA JOKE
By Fatima Ijaz
Theme: Nausea Jokes
(Started by Rahul Aijaz)
I had an intense deja vu last night. I...ordered pizza, and it never came. In the patriarchy, women are subject to strange shame. Must we never be allowed garam or thanda pizza? Sort of queer like a beer that can't be touched. Holy shit.
Always
Joke by Moonis Azad
I can't disappear unfortunately. Always here. In the same place.
(Karachi University Professor Life, inside joke)
THE BEGUM JOKES by Taha Kehar
Begum vs Critic (Part 1)
Critic: Don't read her book. The plot is nowhere in sight.
Begum: Arre baba, logical bano na? Why look for a plot of land in a book when you should be looking for a story?
Begum vs Critic (Part 2)
Critic: Don't read her book. The writer talks too much about sex.
Begum: Dekho, I'll read it if she writes about safe sex. Too much of safe sex isn't bad, no?
Begum vs Critic (Part 3)
Critic: Don't read her book. All she does is rant about her monstrous mother-in-law.
Begum: Hain? Horror story hai kya?
Critic: If only it was a horror story, I'd have accepted its numerous flaws. All she does is complain about how evil her mother-in-law was. Don't bother with it.
Begum: Tu kya hua? She's writing from the heart, na. I'd love to read it. I had a mom-in-law too. Two, actually. One, very briefly. The other unofficially, if you get my drift. Both monsters. Both dead, thankfully. Reading her book might inspire me to write my own horror story.
Feminist Joke
by Fatima Ijaz
Her dream ambition was to become a maid, look after kids, be servile and the proper obsequious idiot to her master, the Husband. Qualified. Rejected: woman of wits. Laugh my darling, this world is no place for a fool says Gatsby’s other.
The Jokes of Clown
Joke of Clown, # 1
Cleaning and cooking. Cooking and cleaning. Cleaning and cooking. Cooking and clean - I had a clown who had a frown that could cook and clean.
Joke of Clown, # 2
Father's House or Husband's house - father's house or husband's house father's house or - hssssssss Saanp aya hei, ground zero creature.
INTRODUCING PAKISTANI JOKES
JOKE # 1: Pink Panther theme song plays in background and...
The line is: "America return or America return?"
Connotation 1: Have I left or am I still there?
Connotation 2: How many american left return? hahaha...
Connotation 3: ...............
JOKE # 2: Dead end, dead end, dead end, dead end, dead endddd dead end dead end dead ANT
Connotation 1: Make it out alive
Connotation 2: will this ant survive?
Connotation 3: Aunt in America
QUEER JOKES
1. The cult of queer would like to see you fear your form.
I stir the coffee, I kill a comet. - Planet Coffee
